Bananas 1971

As the world watches in horror, renowned sportscasters Don Dunphy and Howard Cosell (playing himself) report on the Wide World of Sports television broadcast that the president of the island Republic of San Marcos has met a tragic end, replaced by the ruthless General Emilio M. Vargas (Carlos Montalbán). Meanwhile, in New York City, Fielding Mellish ((Woody Allen)), a product researcher at General Equipment, is stuck in a rut, testing innovative products like electrically warmed toilet seats, coffins with piped-in music, and the “Execusizer,” a gym built into desks for busy corporate executives. Unfulfilled in his professional life, Fielding attributes his lack of success to not having finished college.

Fielding’s personal life is equally uneventful, until Nancy (Louise Lasser), a passionate and politically active college student, knocks on his door, seeking support for the revolutionaries in San Marcos, who are fighting against the corrupt dictator. As they work together to gather signatures, Fielding finds himself smitten with Nancy’s fire and conviction. Despite her busy schedule of yoga classes and women’s group meetings, Nancy agrees to go out with Fielding, and he accompanies her to political rallies and riots, eventually winning her heart.

However, their happiness is short-lived, as Nancy begins to feel that something is missing in their relationship. She breaks the news to Fielding, explaining that she needs someone who is a leader, more politically aware, and less emotionally, sexually, and intellectually immature. The breakup devastates Fielding, leading him to quit his job and embark on a journey to San Marcos, where he had planned to vacation with Nancy.

Before leaving, Fielding visits his parents, a surgeon and nurse, in the midst of an operation, to share the news that he will be away for a while. His father tries to instill confidence in him by suggesting he take over the family business, but Fielding’s mother gives her blessing, acknowledging that she wants her son to follow his own path.

In the impoverished Republic of San Marcos, where peasants are forced to pay their weight in manure to the dictator, a captured rebel is subjected to psychological torture by listening to a recording of Naughty Marietta, ultimately revealing the rebels’ plan for a revolution on July 4th. Upon checking into a hotel, Fielding receives an invitation to dine with Vargas at the palace, setting him on a course that will test his courage and convictions.

As they dine together, Vargas candidly shares his vision with Fielding, revealing a sinister intent to purge perceived threats by eliminating “a few troublemakers.” Unfazed by Fielding’s pointed observation that the rebels are not Communists, Vargas leaves him with the bill, seemingly oblivious to the gravity of their conversation. After Fielding’s departure, Vargas and his cohorts deliberate, ultimately deeming him an ideal pawn in their game of deception. Under the guise of rebellion, they plot to orchestrate a staged killing, framing the revolutionaries for the death of an American citizen and manipulating public opinion to sway United States support towards their regime.

Later that day, Vargas’ henchmen, disguised as rebels, launch a failed attempt on Fielding’s life, aiming to pin the blame for an American casualty on the revolutionaries. Though Fielding manages to evade the assassination attempt, he soon finds himself in the custody of the genuine rebels, led by Esposito.

At the rebels’ camp, Fielding is warned that Vargas has already reported his death to the press and will stop at nothing to silence him. The rebels plead with Fielding to remain and risk everything for their cause, but he prioritizes his personal life, citing being “dead” as a significant hindrance to his romantic escapades. However, he gradually becomes embroiled in rebel activities, learning essential survival skills such as marksmanship, explosive handling, camouflage tactics, and first aid.

When the camp faces food shortages, Fielding is dispatched to raid the nearby town, accompanied by a few comrades. They infiltrate a café, ordering an astonishing quantity of sandwiches, copious amounts of coleslaw, and refreshments, which they then deliver back to the rebels’ hideout.

Esposito subsequently entrusts Fielding with a high-stakes mission: kidnapping the British ambassador to serve as a hostage until imprisoned sympathizers are freed. As Fielding and his companions prepare to sedate the ambassador using sodium pentothal, he inadvertently renders his comrades unconscious. The ambassador escapes, and his revived associates flee, prompting Fielding to don a disguise and blend in with a Catholic procession to evade suspicious soldiers.

Meanwhile, Vargas mistakenly believes that the United Jewish Appeal is the CIA, forging an alliance that ultimately proves ineffective. When the rebels launch their attack, he discovers that the Jewish fundraisers offer little military support. The CIA does send reinforcements, but half of these agents are dispatched to fight on behalf of the dictator, while the other half join the rebellion against him.

As Vargas’ regime crumbles, he flees to the relative safety of Miami, abandoning his stronghold amidst the chaos and destruction he has wrought.

As the rebels’ triumph settles, Esposito’s tyrannical tendencies come to the forefront, as he decrees a Swedish-only language policy and demands citizens don fresh underwear every 30 minutes, flaunting it outside their attire for ease of inspection. This bizarre edict, coupled with other draconian measures, dawns on his comrades that Esposito has succumbed to the corrupting influence of power. In response to pleas from his fellow rebels, Fielding assumes the presidency, but soon realizes that San Marcos’ fragile democracy is vulnerable to future dictatorships unless external support can be secured. The crux of the matter lies in the fact that the international community perceives them as Communists, while Communist nations view them as American pawns. Furthermore, they possess no leverage with which to negotiate aid, save for a surplus of bananas.

Confronted by this daunting reality, Fielding’s advisors urge him to travel to the United States and raise capital, but he knows that his reputation back home as an unrefined product tester holds little sway in Washington. Disguising himself behind a fiery beard and mustache, Fielding arrives in America, where he is formally welcomed as San Marcos’ leader. However, his interpreter’s translations prove woefully inadequate, repeatedly rendering every English phrase into a thick, accented dialect, which culminates in the arrival of men in white coats brandishing a butterfly net to spirit him away.

During a dinner fundraiser at which Fielding serves as the guest of honor, he attempts to regale the audience with a jest about a farmer’s incestuous relationships with his daughters, only to realize that he has misjudged his audience. Nancy, unaware of his true identity, approaches him to express her admiration for the leader, and after they retire to their bedroom together, Fielding reveals his true persona. Nancy subsequently remarks that she now understands why something in their intimate encounter had seemed lacking.

As the FBI closes in on Fielding’s carefully crafted disguise, a web of deceit is spun around him. The authorities’ suspicions are fueled by his history of involvement in tumultuous protests and riots, leading them to accuse him of attempting to undermine the government. Meanwhile, Roger Grimsby breaks the news on the six o’clock broadcast that Fielding has been arrested for allegedly being a subversive imposter, with charges ranging from fraud to conspiracy to overthrow the government - all stemming from his infamous use of the term “thighs” in mixed company. In a bold move, Fielding decides to represent himself in court, where he faces off against formidable opponents including J. Edgar Hoover (disguised as a black woman) and Miss America. As the trial unfolds, a character witness describes Fielding as a “warm, wonderful human being,” but the court reporter’s scribbled notes reveal a starkly different sentiment: “a conniving little rat.” In a bizarre twist, Fielding attempts to cross-examine himself, prompting the judge to take drastic measures by binding and gagging him. The jury returns a guilty verdict on twelve counts, but with one condition: if Fielding agrees not to settle into the judge’s neighborhood, his 15-year sentence is suspended.

With his freedom restored, Fielding proposes to Nancy, and their wedding night is broadcast live from the Royal Manhattan Hotel, courtesy of Wide World of Sports. Cosell provides a play-by-play commentary from the couple’s hotel suite, regaling viewers with vivid descriptions of the action unfolding behind closed doors. In a post-coital interview with Cosell, Nancy shares her honest assessment: while Fielding may not have been the best she’s ever had, he certainly wasn’t the worst either. Fielding himself predicts that their next “bout” will take place in late spring, leaving viewers eagerly anticipating the drama to come. As Cosell wraps up the interview, he quips, “They may live happily ever after, or again they may not - but rest assured, I’ll be there to cover every momentous occasion.”